This must be the week for second guessing. Not only am I second guessing what I am doing with my life and why I'm at Michigan, but also my topic that I have chosen for the semester. My topic is comparing home care to residential care facilities on the topic of identity of Alzheimer's patients. I know I am supposed to say people with Alzheimer's, but really there is only so many times you can type that without going crazy.
During the inquiry phase I was so overwhelmed with the amount of information and I had thought I really picked a great topic. I did, don't get me wrong. However, I am sick of reading, writing, and thinking about home care and RCFs and how they affect someone's identity. Do I even believe what I'm writing? I don't really believe identity is composed of just the environment and interactions one is in. I don't believe one solution solves all. It all depends on something else, nothing is static.
The hardest part for me is trying to make my paper interesting and through provoking when I am not even interested in writing it.
I started thinking about Brett and how she is getting her masters or PHD in rhetoric. That made me feel a little better (no offense Brett) because my topic could be a lot worse (rhetoric) and I could have to read, write, think, eat, breath it for a few years. Now I know that I probably don't want to work in a RCF or as a home care aide.
After my convincing paper is in on Wednesday and my physics exam is over on Thursday. I am relaxing.
Heather,
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you are really having a rough time with your paper/academic life at the moment. I concur that after reading about the same topic over and over and over again, it can make you almost hate the topic; honestly, that's how I felt about my paper this weekend, so I just gave myself a break from the topic. Then, on Monday, I delved back into the paper, and found it interesting again. Maybe you need to just take some time to step back and not think about this topic anymore. I hope the paper ending up being a bearable experience and that taking the break from the Alzheimer's topic this weekend will refresh you. I think that is one of the most important lessons that you learn in college: understanding your thresholds and finding out when it is best to just walk away from a situation to avoid becoming burnt out.
Good luck on your exam tomorrow!
James